01.29.07
THIS JUST IN !!!
The Senate has agreed to schedule a vote later this week on who should lose the Super Bowl.
While the Republican leaders have shown usual neo-con attitudes towards strength and pressure to allow the best team to win, the wise and progressive Democratic leaders have opted for a diplomatic summit between the head coaches to reach agreement on the easiest way to avoid a conflict to make sure everyone loses, but will live to play another day. Or die.
Breaking the chains of decades of tradition, the Democratic party sees their ‘new direction’ as a breakthrough in the useless violence and hopes that such a discussion between the teams can resolve what has traditionally been a harsh conflict between two competing factions that occurs every year.
In what seems to be an annual event, these men- often from differing areas- meet to battle each other in obvious sectarian violence, and while the world watches the trauma increases on both sides. Also, as a men-only event, many women’s rights groups have engaged in the edges of this potentially raging conflict. Their tactics are among the strongest- which may assure their victory- as they have adorned uniforms that consist of tight clothing and short skirts, most often camoflaged in the surroundings of the front that they are dancing (AHEM) patrolling in.
Rumors have it that often these sides spend weeks and months in secret meetings and preliminary practice exercises to attempt to insure their success.
Both sides are said to have many supporters who refuse to engage in the battle, but secretly support the efforts of one side or the other. Some make their support openly with money and support, and some secretly from the comfy cushions of their neo-con, Repulican Lazy-Boy recliners, like rich, fat-cat Monday morning quarterbacks. (this reporter isn’t sure what a “quarterback” is)
Democrats in Congress have issued lengthy condemnations of this battle, and openly support one side or the other, but won’t say which one really, just that one side shouldn’t play very long.
Republican leaders, in typical fashion, have chosen a side, but some members have not decided whether they really want to win, or maybe if they just want the game to continue to play.
This reporter has sources in both of the actual coaches offices, and both sides have said they expect victory and want to do everything possible to achieve it.
As one source said, “If you are going to fight, you have to fight to WIN !! Anything else, any thing less, anything other than a battle to the finish with our team standing as the winner…. we owe victory to our fans, our friends, our family….”
This reporter will add- we owe that to our country.
